Why I Don’t Like The Soulmate Concept

by Conscious Reminder

It is nothing about if soulmates exist or don’t exist. They probably exist, or they don’t exist.

It is actually about the soulmate concept which is a bullsh*t, as it sometimes makes us feel inferior when it comes to ourselves or our relationships and insecurities. Or it is about every small thing which goes wrong every day with our loved one.

Just like true soulmates don’t argue, or harbor resentment. As if they never hide the feelings and go to bed angry.

Soulmates make one another pleasing breakfasts in bed each morning. They stop arguments before they occur by practicing meditation together for about five minutes, staring into the eyes of each other.

They are always honest as they are supposed to. They tell each other everything sincerely.

“The idea of a soulmate is beautiful and very romantic to talk about it in a movie or a song, but in reality, I find it scary.” – Vanessa Paradis

So, what is going to happen when we actually change?

So, does the ‘ideally suited’ concept adapt to specific changes in our lives? It often does not.

The ideally suited concept appears temporal to some people. When in a relationship, people usually change at different speeds and rates, based on a lot of different factors.

In fact, some of them will experience a tragedy or awakening, and all that will change them. Then, they will probably realize that they want even more of this world. However, when they know that, their relationship can sometimes not hold the goal, as it is too big.

“Just when I think I have learned the way to live, life changes.” – Hugh Prather

Our lives constantly change. Adaptability can be admirable, but it cannot be a guarantee, definitely not for relationships.

So, what if a person was our soulmate in the past, but is not anymore? That is why a lot of people consider this soulmate concept bullsh*t.

Because, rather than coming to mutual agreements that the best times already passed, we counsel that we are sure that it will not work.

This is not as love disappeared, but as our life trajectories changed. Maybe the following part of our journey will trek alone. Perhaps it will be with another person or in a different way.

Searching for our soulmate is also bullsh*t.

When we envision our ideal soulmate concept, regardless of the fact if we believe that he or she is real or is not, what are we thinking of?

Well, if soulmates exist, it is unnecessary to search for them. They will not hide from us, and they sound ethereal to us. If they exist, they will find us, right when they feel that it is the appropriate time.

However, people tend to search for their soulmates. They utilize matching algorithms in order to convince others and themselves that when someone is about 96% matching them, he or she could be the soulmate they were searching for. 

This is why the soulmate concept was said to be bullsh*t. As it makes us unhappy, ungrateful, and unfulfilled with the person, we are together with, or alone and because our own expectations are really high.

Enjoying our journey

Every person that says that he or she likes causal dating may be a psychopath. Causal dating is a real disaster, even when everything goes in the best order. This is like kissing the frog to find our price or our princess.

So, those that search for their soulmates should stop doing that right now. Every one of us is on a specific journey in our life, love, and work. This means that we should take the needed time and enjoy it.

So, when we discount the concept of soulmates, we open ourselves up to new experiences. Our love journey should be unrestrained and fun.

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