It seems like every other day I am seeing an article on my Facebook feed about narcissists, empaths and romances between narcissists and empaths.
Both empaths and narcissist are buzz words that people seem to be using more and more to describe themselves or people they know.
What it is interesting is that I have observed that narcissist are like the shadow of the empath. Whatever the light touches also casts a shadow, and I feel that both narcissists and empaths are one side of the same coin.
What is a Narcissist?
Firstly, narcissism is a mental disorder, however today the term is being used more freely to describe people who most likely are living from a place of extreme ego.
No one is born a narcissistic, it is a behavior pattern that is developed over time. Narcissists are described as being manipulative, lacking empathy, having split personalities, being controlling and having a heightened sense of self importance.
On a deeper level however, perhaps the narcissist is an empath themselves, but just can’t seem to figure out how to handle all of their emotions. This then results in them shutting out their emotions, feeding the ego and turning into a seemingly emotionless person.
Perhaps a narcissist has so much empathy that they don’t know what to do with, so it manifests as them displaying narcissistic tendencies.
What is an Empath?
We are all intuitive and sensitive to energy to some degree, but empaths are here to light the way and to hold the torch for other people to follow. Empaths are here to increase our awareness to energy and that we are all energetic beings.
The same goes for the narcissist, they are simply holding the torch to expose the ego and how it can take over and make the person seem almost inhumane.
Empaths and narcissist have always been around, but as our consciousness continues to evolve, we are becoming more aware of these behaviour patterns.
Why Empaths and Narcissists Attract
Both the empath and the narcissist would recognize themselves in one another. The empath would want to cure and help the narcissist and the narcissist would want to learn and perhaps even suck energy from the empath as a way to cope.
Often we view the narcissist as a spineless villain who is out to take advantage of the empath, but perhaps really deep down on a subconscious level, the narcissist is trying to understand how the empath has been able to use their gifts.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that the empath should tolerate or become a victim of the narcissists behaviour, but perhaps this may explain why an empath would get sucked into this type of relationship.
On a deeper level, the empath can see the narcissists cry for help and guidance. In this type of relationship, the empath is responding to something much deeper and below the surface.
There is no doubt that the empath is the narcissists greatest teacher, it is just up to the narcissist to embrace the lesson. But it is important to understand that it is not the empaths responsibility to change the ways of the narcissist.
For those empaths who have been or currently are in a relationship with someone displaying narcissistic behavior, it is important to understand that you are not responsible for healing them. Only the narcissist can do that when they realize that they too are an energetic being that has been gripped by the fear of the ego.
Just the same, the narcissist is most likely going to be the empaths greatest teacher as it will help to expand their gifts and expose any self-limiting beliefs that are blocking the empath from living their life to the fullest.
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5 comments
You have the definition of an empath mixed up with the definition of empathy and someone who is just extremely sensitive, or someone who is just going through the process of awakening to the consciousness shift. TRUE empaths are few and far between. I know because I am one. An empath is extremely intuitive and sensitive, that’s true, BUT they don’t sense the energy deeply hidden beneath the exterior of a narcissist or anyone else. They actually LITERALLY take on the emotions of others. Someone with extreme empathy can sense what someone might be feeling based on observing their actions or feel bad that someone is crying and it makes them cry too. The same is true for a sensitive. They can sense an energy field but that’s all. They just sense the energy that is being projected. An empath will literally feel the emotion. Let’s say the empath is at home and feeling really happy because they just found out a family member is pregnant. And then all of a sudden, without warning, they feel extreme saddness and an overwhelming feeling of wanting to cry. This is an odd thing to have happen when not even 30 seconds ago the empath was feeling extremely happy. Then there’s a knock on the door and the empath opens it knowing that there is someone on the other side of that door who just got some really horrible news. And behold, it’s a neighbor crying their heart out because someone just died. The empath cries with them because the empath doesn’t just feel bad for them, the empath feels just as crushed as the neighbor because the empath’s emotions don’t realize that it is not happening to them, it is happening to someone else. The empath’s emotions can’t tell the difference between what they are feeling and what the neighbor is feeling because they are one and the same. Ever hear of the saying “I know how you feel”? To most people, that is just a saying because they can’t actually feel how the other person feels. They can only sympathize. But for an empath, that saying is actually true because we literally know how you feel. It’s because of articles like this that we have people thinking they are empaths when they are only experiencing empathy or awakening to the consciousness shift. Big difference.
I think you’re also off base on what’s a narcissist. I am not one, though I’ve been accused of same by people who really are. True Narcissistic Personality Disordered people are dangerous and suck energy. They provide none to their victims and put on a false façade that can make others actually think they’re empaths. It’s the latter group of “flying monkeys” they rely upon to triangulate their victims into submission to their will. It’s all about control, making themselves look like special people while they prey on members of their harem (multiple partners being a real marker of a true narcissist). Professionals may agree with your assessment of how they come to be, but whether they can be cured is considered nearly impossible. To portray these people as anything other than dangerous predators does your readers a real disservice.
being narcissistic or an empath are attributes. They do not define us. people hold on to labels too tightly. I liked this perspective a lot as its clear and comes from a space of love. <3
This is an extremely innocent explanation for what a Narcissist truly is….an insidious predator who only hurts the targets he preys on. They have been defined as “emotional vampires”, they are soul sucking parasites.
We cannot be judgmental, if we wished not to be judge
We cannot hate if we wish to be beings of Love
We must not assume if we wish to be wise
We are preservers of life if we wish to bring balance to man and nature
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