Regaining Control Over Your Life: To Let Go Doesn’t Always Mean To Give Up

by Conscious Reminder 

Isn’t letting one of the hardest things to do?

Sometimes, it is so hard that we choose to be part of trashy relationships rather than just letting go!

But the fact is that if you are doing this, you are only betraying yourself. You are becoming an unhappy person because of your own choices and nothing else.

Well, we cannot deny that breaking up and letting go is like giving up; and it hurts so much because you are giving up on a relationship that you thought was fulfilling and giving you everything that you want. The truth is that it is hard to give up on the idea of the relationship that you had; an utopian idea where everything was like a dream. But when that idea fails, you feel like you have failed, like you are losing on something. But the reality is that you aren’t losing anything if you let go because you never had it in the first place.

All that you keep rewinding in your mind are the good times and the happy experiences that you have had with your partner. These experiences make you feel that when you leave your partner, it is going to be the end of the world.

But, is it going to be?

You have to understand that you have to let go in order to be happy; because letting go will nourish your life and make it better. Letting go is also a process and you have to go through this entire process in order to heal yourself completely.

Yes, it is certainly not easy. Here are the five steps of the process of letting go:

1. Denial

We begin by living in denial. We think that our partner cannot turn their back on us and they are going to come back and they are going to be there for us. We keep checking our phones for messages and calls from them. We keep praying that they will come back and “save” us but that’s not going to happen. You must refrain from trying to contact your partner as well. Just try to understand that what has happened; has happened for the good.

2. Anger

This is the time when you finally realize the reality of the break up. You realize that you have to let go and then all that you do is rewind memories of everything that happened in the relationship. You begin to place blame and consider your partner wrong for their actions. You also set into a journey where you need revenge from them and you want them to suffer because you think that they have done “bad” with you. Calm down and try to forgive your partner for whatever they have done. Forgiving is good for you.

3. Bargaining

This is the time when you bargain in life and choose to do things so that you can cope with the failing relationship. Some of us work too hard, some of us drink too much, some of us cry a lot, some of us blame everything that is happening in our life. We bargain in order to feel better and in order to reach a point of purgation. But certainly, none of these things really help.

4. Depression

You will hit rock bottom. You will be sad and broken in this phase. But remember, things will get better after this. All you have to do is that you have to be patient and kind to yourself. You also have to realize that you will always have one person which is you. Accept yourself and love yourself just the way you are. Also, try and be happy as much as you can.

5. Acceptance

Ultimately you will accept that you have to let go. You will rationalize beyond the emotional overwhelming that you felt and you will begin to take strides in your life. Don’t worry, the fact is that you made it!

You, strong soul!


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