::Aries (March 21 – April 19)

As an Aries, you are absolutely obsessed and fascinated with the idea of death. While a lot of other people can get turned off at such a morbid conversation topic, you seem to relish in it. You try to approach the concept of death from a variety of angles, emotionally, scientifically, economically, and more. You understand that it is a normal phenomenon of life and that people should be open to talking about it.

::Taurus (April 20 – May 21)

If Stalking 101 were a real college course, you’d be the most sought after professor. You Taurus people have uncanny stalking skills. You could be Sherlock Holmes with the way that you can dig up random information about the people you’re very interested in. Whether it be someone’s Facebook page or Instagram feed, you are very good at unearthing a person’s past and bringing it into the light of the present.

::Gemini (May 22 – June 21)

You are a serial liar, and you know it. Don’t even try to deny it, because then, you’d just be lying to yourself as you do with just about everyone else. You just can’t seem to get comfortable with telling people the truth. The worst part about it is that people always know when you’re lying because you’ve practically built a reputation for being a fibber.

::Cancer (June 22 – July 22)

You can develop quite an unhealthy obsession for the people who you love. You have crazy tendencies and people can often get freaked out at your obsessive behavior. They fear that you might get downright violent and harmful because of how overly passionate and obsessive you can become. Perhaps you can try turning things down a notch and use a more mellow approach when interacting with people.

::Leo (July 23 – August 22)

People can get really weirded out at how you’re absolutely obsessed with the idea of your own death. As a Leo, you can’t deny that you often think about how people would react to you dying. You picture the image of your own funeral in your head. You think about all the people who would be there; which ones would be crying, which ones would be secretly happy at your demise. This is not a normal thought that all people tend to have.

::Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Your sexual fantasies, while interesting, can also be downright frightening for a lot of people. You have the weirdest and most creative ways of expressing your sensuality and it can be very intimidating to tamer and less experienced human beings. Your sexual conquests are a thing of epics, and perhaps it would be best if you only broadcast them to a selective audience.

::Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Every time you use a computer, you better make sure to go incognito and erase your search history after every use. You wouldn’t want the outside world knowing about the stuff you’ve been using the internet for. You have quite the creepiest search history among your peers and it would be best for you to be secretive about it. If someone ever managed to hack into your PC’s search history, they would be absolutely scarred by what they would find.

::Scorpio (October 23 – November 22)

You have a very imaginative and downright sadistic mind with a level of creativity that would stun the people around you. If you ever get to encounter a mind reader at any point in your life, then that mind reader would run away from you as far as possible. You have the weirdest thoughts but you just can’t help it. You think about the easiest ways you can hurt people, kill animals, cause riots, and other things that not everyone spends time thinking about.

::Sagittarius (November 23 – December 21)

You have the face of a robot. It’s as if you are completely devoid of emotion. Regardless of whatever emotion the situation calls for, you maintain that blank face like you’re a corkboard. It could be you informing a friend of a tragedy, or celebrating with someone over an achievement. You always maintain a face of pure stoicism.

::Capricorn (December 22 – January 20)

It’s like you’re a frustrated scriptwriter or author who is obsessed with murder stories. You try to think of ways that you can murder your different friends and family members without getting caught. The weirdest part is that you are very detail-oriented in your thoughts.

::Aquarius (January 21 – February 18)

You are obsessed with the idea of giving speeches at funerals. It could be because you just want to be prepared should the unfortunate opportunity ever arise, but it’s a weird thing to be prepared for. You can’t deny that you would also feel weird if people started practicing their eulogies for your funeral while you were still alive.

::Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

You have the weirdest daydreams that always play to your strengths and unfortunately, always place other people as victims. You imagine yourself as a hero in scenarios wherein people are dying and starving for your assistance.

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