Imagine, for a moment, you are lying on the ground, your left hand a mess due to a bad fall, and you’re clutching it, but suddenly, you feel pain in your right. You are unable to explain this scenario, but this happens. It is a real thing, which is called “referred pain”.
While this example may be of an external variety, you might have heard people considering someone’s traumatic past which still causes them nightmares, as simply a lack of sleep, and bad eating habits.
You might have also realized that at a certain point, this pain seems to be overwhelming, and regardless of what someone says, you just can’t seem to deal with, by just treating the symptoms.
This is what the eternal truth is. The mere fact, that human life is suffering, and pain is recurring. You can’t hide from it, you can’t escape it, you can’t confront it and repel it. You have to stand and face it.
You have to deal with the pain, for that is true life. An everlasting cycle of suffering, that has no escape. While it might seem hopeless, the mere hopelessness gives us hope.
The realization that human life would continue to be a miserable and painful existence, shouldn’t turn anyone off at the idea of living. For living is just that- hit at the source of the pain, and endure until it vanishes. You can try stabbing at the branches and tearing off a leaf here, and there, but it would always grow up.
The need of the hour is to hit the roots and remove it. And that can only come by learning that pain is life, life pain. Don’t look at pain in fright, or in disgust. It is there, to teach you the ways of the world. To highlight, that true wisdom comes from penance.
Projecting Onto Others
This is the first phase of referred pain. We might never really know what referred pain truly is, but we can understand that life is miserable. Now, while that may be a Sisyphian gesture on blaming the whole wide world that it is their fault for burdening you as the scapegoat for their crimes, the truth is, it is all you.
It is your consciousness that is tripping over rocks and debris along the way, which you think to be the faults of other people. As Beckett mentions in Waiting for Godot, “There is the man all over you. Blaming the shoe for the faults of the feet.” Learn to live with yourself.
When you are projecting onto someone else, the truth of your life, you yourself are unable to understand or fully grasp it. You have yet to answer the question “Who Am I?” The moment you are able to realize it, you would stop addressing your issues onto other, and start focussing on yourselves, by trying to heal yourself and living through the pain.
Overreactions
By overreacting to events, you are deferring the pain onto someone else, who has no idea, that it exists. You are unable to deal with the trauma that the other person inadvertently brought on yourself, so you decide to bring it on him, where he has no clue that he is being considered as an outsider for no fault of his. This brings out the innate shadow energy in you.
What needs to be done is accept that trauma and pain are a part of everyone’s life, and no one is bereft of it. By trying to not believe that it exists, you are deferring the pain, which would finally catch up to you in a major way, that wouldn’t be conducive to your living.
Live with the pain, accept it, and let it heal you. That is the only way!
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