Things like forgiveness are pretty complicated, to say the least. As humans it is likely that we all have that one bone in all our bodies that makes us hold on to things that are painful and cause suffering.
It is not inhuman to be unable to let go of grudges, anger and negative feelings. That being said, most of the time we also do not understand the effect it has on us, our bodies, minds and souls. We all forget one simple thing- we all deserve forgiveness, even our own self. We might find it especially difficult to do the above but we must, for our own sake and our own well being.
Let us discuss a few things that we must forgive ourselves for.
1. Forgive yourself for struggling with self acceptance
Things are almost never easy and that is just how life goes. Many of us suffer from an inability to accept our own selves the way we are because of the society, where he grew up, the people around us and so on. While we should work on looking at ourselves in a better way and stop finding faults, this process can only begin once we forgive ourselves for not being positive about ourselves all the time. Sometimes life sucks and nothing goes right and that makes us hate ourselves and to reverse that, we must forgive ourselves for succumbing to self hate when things got bad.
2. Forgive yourself for seeking validation from the wrong people
Well, this does not need as much explanation. Us humans, as social beings, thrive on validation and honestly, there is nothing fundamentally wrong with that. We like hearing nice things from people but sometimes it takes an unhealthy turn, when we start craving validation from people who are not good for us and expect us to forget our own selves and make everything about them. We fall prey to this toxicity sometimes and while it is not ideal, do not blame yourself for making mistakes.
3. Forgive yourself for not being self assured all the time
Let us face it: we are all human and it is pretty difficult to maintain self assurance all the time. Sometimes life throws situations and even people at us that make us question everything about ourselves and not in the healthiest way. That is not something we can control sometimes and that is okay. Let yourself off the hook because it is not easy to live.
4. Forgive yourself for the things you did wrong
As mentioned earlier, you are human and as someone wise once said, ‘to err is human’. You made mistakes, you screwed up, you did things you should not have done and so on. That is okay, despite what your brain tells you. It is impossible to be perfect so cut yourself some slack. You are not a machine. Think of these mistakes as learning processes. If you are not making mistakes, you are not learning, you are not growing. Making no mistakes will only bring stagnancy, so let go of these things. Forgive yourself and move on.
5. Forgive yourself for being judgemental
It is really not desirable to be a judgemental person but as humans, we cannot always control the things we feel. We judge other people, and ourselves as well, sometimes. Forgive yourself for being the victim of the situation. It was not in your control and sometimes we are influenced by other people. Realising that you have been judgemental and forgiving yourself for it is the first step towards true peace.
6. Forgive yourself for giving up temporarily
There are truly soul crushing moments when the world seems to be closing in on us and nothing goes our way. We feel alone, left out and abandoned. These moments cause to give up everything that we dream of, we stand for and what we believe in and that is okay. One has to allow oneself to have their heartbreak. It is not the end of the world even if it seems like it. Forgive yourself for giving yourself that opportunity to just mourn. You deserved it. You are human.
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