by Conscious Reminder
There are times when many of us feel that we are not deserving of our achievements. We feel that what we have done is not good enough; somebody else could have done it better.
You may have never heard the term but maybe facing the ‘imposter syndrome’ if you have felt any of these things.
In the initial stages of awareness of this phenomenon, women were considered the only victims. But men too are part of the club. The main factor which determines this condition is the belief that success in life has been a result of luck and chance.
Someone else could be more deserving. You feel unworthy of all the generosity that life has bestowed on you. You are sure that there is someone more competent than you.
There is a big chance that people who feel like imposters on these lines may have been born into families that laid extra emphasis on achievement and success at any cost.
Unrelenting criticism as a child can internalize the idea that no amount of success can be good.
Even as a child, the seeds of doubt are sown in them that they are the only one betting on their achievements. Everybody can see that they not suited to succeed at all.
In spite of being high achievers and authorities in their field, they continue facing the imposter syndrome. They feel fraudulent and guilty.
They can’t seem to shake away the feeling that all their achievements are fraudulent and it is only a matter of time before they are exposed.
There might be other factors at play that determines the prevalence of such feeling. It could be linked to race. This feeling may exist among minorities that they are the victims of sympathy rather than achievements.
We refuse to or are unable to be at peace with who we are. We struggle to feel worthy and deserving of our accomplishments.
You begin by focusing on everything that you are not and believe that what you are is all a fake and a lie. You begin to agonize over perceived flaws in your ability.
You then begin to impose unbelievable and unrealizable expectations on yourself. You end up facing the imposter syndrome.
A study by researchers in the Harvard Business Review has linked it to perfectionism and that makes sense in many ways. The way out from this crevice is to first recognize the feelings as they emerge.
Share your feelings and have an open dialogue with somebody who can help you. Remind yourself that it is okay to not know everything and there is always room for progress.
If you feel that you or someone close to you is facing the ‘Imposter syndrome’ without being aware of it, be assured that it is no big deal and you can work on it. Just support them when they need you.
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