Why The Love Language Of Gifting Is Deemed Bad And Superficial?

by Conscious Reminder

Gary Chapman, a marriage counselor, had identified 5 languages of love. Of them, the one misunderstood the most is the one of gift-giving.

It is almost always assumed that anyone who likes getting gifts as a sign of affection is shallow or materialistic. But, actually, the case is not always like that.

What Is The Meaning If Your Love Language Is Gift-Giving?

Anyone whose love language is gifting feels loved the most when they receive tangible items from their partners. Chapman’s theory of love languages states that how a person chooses to receive affection in the relationship is their love language.

For those whose love language is gift-giving, the thought put into the gift matters more than the object. It suggests that you were in the other person’s mind when you were not there physically. It also means they were thinking of seeing you happy. Lastly, it might be a tangible token signifying a moment, feeling, or experience.

Traits Indicating That Gift-Giving Is Your Language Of Love

1. You feel a physical token of love is more meaningful and real than words.

2. Giving gifts is among the things you enjoy the most in any relationship.

3. You treasure everything given by the partner, regardless of its costs.

4. You dearly appreciate someone putting in the time and effort to get you a gift.

5. Any surprise makes you feel cherished.

6. You feel loved when you get a souvenir from someone on their trip.

7. You really care about holidays and dates on which you can give gifts, like anniversaries and birthdays.

8. For a special occasion, presents that are thoughtful mean a lot to you.

9. You can distinguish between a well-thought-out gift and a last-minute one.

10. You feel extremely cherished and noticed when the partner remembers and gets you something you said you wanted a while ago.

12. Simple acts of generosity and care, like getting you a beverage without asking, hold a lot of meaning for you.

14. You do not expect the partner to handle all the bills. But when it does happen, you feel so much closer.

15. When you get a piece of cloth from your partner, you practically always use it.

16. You would prefer your partner remembering to get you a gift than having the time to be present physically too often.

17. Finally, presents are always too meaningful for you to throw away.

Misconceptions About The Gift-Giving Love Language

The Gifts Have To Cost A Lot

It has nothing to do with money. Rather, it is about the sentiment behind giving gifts. People having this language of love appreciate all tokens, as long as it has a lot of effort, care, and thoughtfulness in it.

Liking Gifts Means Being Materialistic

This assumption is not always true. For these people, gifts stand for love. Being materialistic is not inherent to gifts people. Gifts from partners may be the only physical things they treasure.

Gifts People Never Date Anyone “Broke”

Once more, the point is not money or the amount. A scrapbook worth $10 that the partner filled in by hand will be much more cherished than a generic designer handbag. Actually, if you are broke and still try to do pricey things, gifts people find a lot of meaning in it.

In Conclusion

If your partner is a gifts person, then remember the dates, and also get them some “just because” presents. If you are a gifts person, then tell your partner all about it, what you want what you like. No one can read minds, after all. Money problems can also be solved through this conversation.

In the end, it is not about being shallow or materialistic. Rather, gifts people are more sentimental, nostalgic, and attentive towards their partner’s thoughts.

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