Victims of abuse in Narcissistic or sociopathic relationships would have experienced gaslighting more than a few times.
Whether they understand or know the term or not, when you describe to them the characteristics, they will all agree that it has happened to them.
It is a clear and concrete proof that the person you are with is manipulative.
Narcissists and Sociopaths use this technique often to make their victims even more vulnerable and dependent upon them.
They use gaslighting as a means to control the person who they are in a relationship with.
Gaslighting is when a person says or does something hurtful, and yet when confronted about it, manipulates the situation and their words in such a manner that they get away with it. They make the victim question their own facts.
And they do it so well that the victim ends up doubting their own sanity. When such abuse is inflicted upon someone for too long, they can no longer think clearly of their reality and lose confidence in themselves.
This can be very traumatic and it is very hard to break away from such abuse.
But it is not impossible to counteract gaslighting. At the end of the day, you have to be the person responsible for your own peace of mind.
So how does one counteract gaslighting? Well first of all, they need to realize where gaslighting is being done.
Recognizing it is the first step towards fighting it. If you think that a person goes back on their words a bit too often, try to maintain a physical record of their statements. It could be something as simple as their texts.
When you catch them in a lie, when you have concrete proof of their deception, you’ll be better able to hold on to your confidence.
The next step is greenlighting. You know when a movie or show is in the process of being picked, the ones that get chosen by sponsors are said to have the green light, a sort of green signal to go ahead and start production.
In the same way, greenlighting here is a green signal you give to yourself to go ahead and build yourself up again, trust people again and become who you were supposed to be.
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