by Marisa Donnelly
To my precious child,
I want you to know something. I created you. I knew who you were, who you would become long before you were even born. I knew that you would grow up, that you would fall down, that sometimes you would question yourself even though you were made in my image and I love you so very much.
Some days are easier than others. Some days you pray to me with joy bubbling from your heart. I tell the sun to shine on your face and watch as you dance, laugh, kiss, feel free. In those moments, I know that you are living the way I intended—peacefully, abundantly, and in my light—and I try to show you how beautiful life can be.
But some days you get lost. The pain comes in waves and you suddenly forget who I am, how I have the power to rescue you from whatever demons you face. You turn away from me, try to take matters into your own hands. But you don’t have to do that.
You don’t ever have to feel like you’re fighting alone.
I am here. I am always here. I watch you slip and lose your footing. I watch you turn to vices, chasing emptiness in people, in bottles, in bad habits, spinning yourself in circles. I reach out my hand to you, try to grab ahold of you, give you miracles and blessings and signs, but you don’t see them.
You think I’ve abandoned you—but you are my creation—I will never leave you.
I know the number of hairs on your head, the way your mouth turns into a crooked grin when you laugh, the slight curve of your hips. I know the unpolished fingernails, the callouses, the muscles that fill your upper back.
I know how you loved that girl and are still heartbroken over her. I know how you gave your heart to that boy who ended up falling for someone else. I know what you think about when it’s late and you can’t fall asleep, the songs you sing in the shower, your favorite color, the meal you always cook when you’re sick.
I know you try to fill yourself with all the temporary things of this world even though I gave my Son for you. It breaks my heart.
But I want you to know who I am; I don’t want to force you to come to me. I want you to see the truths of my word in your life and know, beyond any doubt, that I am your God and I will never forsake you.
I long to have a relationship with you. I crave closeness; I want you to be transparent with me and try, every day, to bring yourself and others to my light.
I want you to know that the only promise of forever comes from and through me. I want you to see the blessings I’ve given you, the beautiful ways life has fallen into place when you trust me and my plan. I want you to know that you will make mistakes, you will sin, you will hurt my heart over and over again.
But I will still love you.
I will never stop loving you. And as long as you seek forgiveness, as long as you repent, as long as you ask me to be in your heart and life and believe that my Son died for you—I will forever be within you—guiding you, filling you, moving you forward in hope and joy.
My precious child, you are seen. Your prayers are heard. Your wishes and hopes and pains are felt. Sometimes I do not give you what you want because I’m bringing you something better. Sometimes I don’t answer you in the way you’d like, but trust me anyways. I have a plan.
Don’t wander this earth without a purpose; seek that within me and I will give it to you. Don’t let yourself be beaten down or abused, turn to me for light. Don’t tell yourself that you have to move through these days without anyone beside you because I am here.
You are my child and nothing will change that.
Through whatever darkness or whatever storm, I love you.
And you have nothing to fear.
About the Author: Marisa is a writer, poet, & producer. She is the author of Somewhere On A Highway, a poetry collection on self-discovery, growth, love, loss and the challenges of becoming.
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