Relationships don’t always have to be based on romance. It doesn’t even have to be one-on-one. There are many relationships that come in our way – with a pet, an organization, another person, even an incident.
But what is always true is that these relationships are learning tools. They are teachers which direct us in a certain way and help us grow. Whenever you enter a new relationship, you experience changes, enhancements your characteristics and abilities. Just like any school education would do.
A learning process
Our mind is directly related to our souls. When you are invested in the relationship, your soul is undergoing a process of immense growth. You will come face to face with your inner weaknesses. You will be vulnerable; your insecurities will come out and you’d want to get external approval or attention. But that’s what relationships do. They set a mirror in front of you – you can either look and work on your flaws or you can turn away and let it pass. The choice is yours.
Lessons towards growth
Relationships are hard work, but ultimately, they will change you for better or worse. It’s necessary that you take your time and start keeping a journal to see how you progress. Some of the most important questions to ask when you’re in a relationship are:
1. What do you learn from it?
Relationships are a process of growth, mentally and spiritually. It’s part of our spiritual journey that we have embarked on. It’s a learning process. Ask yourself what the relationship has taught you and what you have gathered that has helped you to grow.
2. What are the changes that are taking place in me because of this relationship?
Coming out of a relationship, you’ll find that you’re not the same person as you were when you entered it. We all change every day, but any relationship that you come into will bring about massive changes in you. You will be a changed person.
3. Is the relationship helping me to reach the greater good?
You come into any kind of relationship with the intent of becoming someone better, reaching some higher plane. So whenever, you are in it, ask yourself, ‘Is this relationship helping me to get to the higher good that I intend to reach?’ It should be a positive thing for your journey.
4. How can I better the relationship?
Relationships are the two-way street. As much as the other party tries to maintain it, it’s impossible if you are passive. So, contribute to the relationship as much as you can. Question yourself: Am I doing enough to better the relationship? If the answer is no, think about how you can contribute.
5. Is the learning process mutual?
You might be learning a lot when you are in a relationship, but again, you are not alone. The learning process should be mutual and you will learn as much from the other person as much as they are supposed to learn from you. Make sure you impart enough of your own knowledge and energy to strengthen the relationship.
6. What am I learning and what have I already learned in this relationship?
Keep a note of your changes. Check how much you’ve grown and try to measure it with your previous self. Learning is important and equally important is to know how much you have learned. How else are you going to implement your knowledge in your life? Keep a separate diary if you have to.
7. Are the people in your relationship encouraging and empowering you to be who you are?
Relationships are not a hindrance. They are more of an external power source to push you through barriers to reach where you want to go. So, whenever you’re stuck, think whether the person, whom you are in a relationship with, is helping you progress in the direction that you’re aiming for or not. You should feel powerful in a relationship, not weakened by it. It can be a powerful positive force or a devastating negative one. Choose your own path!
It might be stressful, like any other learning place but remember, it can become fruitful in the long run. And that’s worth it. So, examine your relationship and learn whatever you can from it. You can grow if you want to. Don’t wait on it!
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