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Self-Love — The Things We Get Wrong About It

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by Conscious Reminder

What does self-love mean? It means to kindly treat yourself. It means to nurture your well-being and growth.

Fully accepting yourself, respecting yourself are also what self-love truly means. But it is not merely about treating oneself. It has to be more than that. It has to do with feeling loved and thought about yourself.

It sounds like a good concept. We all have days when these criteria are not ticked. But we also have days when all of them are fulfilled, yet we still strive to feel right. Why do many of all feel as if things are still off?

Have We Misunderstood Self-Love?

Self-Love, Self-Acceptance, Self-Care is now a social media modern culture. These themes have turned into being unapologetic standards and trends. Which is good if one feels good about them. The idea somehow seems to be about embracing it rather than just yourself. There could be a difference.

Several hashtags follow this trend too. #NoMakeup, #BornThisWay, #Queen, #ThisIsMe, #YasQueen have helped provide information about body-positivity, where people should feel comfortable in their skin— regardless of their shape and size. The culture is important. But in such a harmony of acceptance, accepting that one does not like something in oneself has also become a taboo.

Self-love and self-acceptance culture has somehow made normal the untrue fact that people who are strong do not feel sad or ashamed. But that doesn’t mean self-sabotage, does it?

Let’s Look At Things We Often  Get Wrong About Self-Love

Here are the misconceptions about self-love:

Self-Love is not the same as Self-Care

Do any of us know that self-love is a practice? Like an exercise? When several people are asked about it, they seem confused. But it is true. It is to be practiced we should carry out daily. However, it is not the same as self-care. It does not imply physical fitness, or mental stress, or even skincare.

Our misconceptions refer to self-love as yoga, bubble-baths, or detoxing juices. But it is not something physical. The idea behind such self-care is to be rejuvenated. Taking care of oneself can help one show up better to the world, and then one can help the community better. Studies have also proven that doing things for others, genuinely, like buying/cooking stuff for others, makes one feel less stressed. It produces more prolonged happiness.

It Is About How One Feels, Not Looks

We all pay attention to how our life looks. We set benchmarks as such. But that is not self-love. It is not about how life looks. It is about feeling right from the within. How and what does one speak to oneself? How does one feel looking at oneself in the mirror?

Mental health must be at par with physical health, as well as emotional and spiritual health. All of them together create and mean self-love genuinely.

Self-Love Is Not Exclusive To Love

The meaning behind it is to accept oneself. One has to learn to appreciate how far one has come. Where one is at the moment. And how far one can go. There are several layers to love oneself.

A child grows with love. Just the same, one also has room to grow, and change, and appreciate life.

Stand Out, Don’t Fit In

Like self-love is acceptance, it also means to make your voice heard for the things you care about. It has become a culture. Hence, people feel there is a certain way to fit in with it. But it is not the same.

Self-love is about self-understanding. It is about knowing from within who you are. It is a depth of love one realizes. It has to do with believing in things that matter to you. It is always about who you want to be and being that selflessly. And not just becoming something the world wants you to.

Self-Love Is A Journey

Loving oneself is an experiment that drives life-long. It has to do with discovering the inner-self and understanding who one is. Humans grow, change and learn more about themselves.

Embrace your uniqueness. Trace the one you want to be. You need to be. Search for what interests you. Because your needs evolve too.

Self-Love Does Not Mean You Are Selfish

People have several misconceptions about loving oneself. They believe thinking about oneself is narcissistic or even egoistic. And it is not the truth. It is a collection of harmony and confidence in one’s life.

Remember, when one chooses to love oneself, one decides to hurt less. One person has less shame. One person less of judgments.

So we can all be kind, loving, and compassionate. And it begins with us.

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