by Conscious Reminder
It’s not a very easy thing to recognize, but many people in relationships or otherwise engage in gaslighting. The name comes from the 1944 movie, Gaslight, where one person convinces another that they should not trust themselves.
It’s a form of emotional abuse where you are made to believe that you are always in the wrong. Gaslighting occurs when a person says ‘You’re crazy’ or starts to create or narrate a situation to falsify you.
You start to second guess yourself, feel like you are really seeing things and start trusting others more than yourself. It is one of the worst kinds of emotional abuse.
While not an easy thing to identify, there are certain signs that can show gaslighting taking place. Here are the red flags:
1. They will deny having done something which you know they have done it
Gaslighting starts off with confusion and the best way to confuse others is by lying to them. The first thing that a person does is say that you are wrong even if you have personally witnessed something.
This especially happens when you have no physical evidence but are a sole eye witness. They will tell you you’re wrong and formulate a believable narrative proving that you are in the wrong. It will put you in a feeling of constant self-delusion, even before you know it.
2. Making You Feel Guilty
If you are in a relationship, then a gaslighter will always twist a tale making you say ‘Sorry’ multiple times. You won’t hear any apology coming from them.
You will be the one who is put at fault at everything and you will be the one apologizing for it. It creates a guilt mentality that the gaslighter wants.
3. They will start ghosting
Another tactic that a gaslighter uses is ghosting. Once you bring up something, they will make themselves aloof. They will not recognize you even if you are in front of them, or they will purposely avoid you.
Once they start doing that, your feeling of guilt starts to rise. You think that you were in the wrong to bring up the subject in the first place. By making you upset and diverting you, the gaslighter gets the advantage over you.
They will say you have mental issues
The gaslighter will also shift the blame on you and make you start questioning yourself. At one point, it becomes so much that you will doubt yourself and your mental health.
They will make you feel that you are too sensitive and so you throw tantrums all the time. You will start losing your ability to make decisions on important topics. They have complete control over you.
If you do not leave a gaslighter when the time is right, you will end up losing your health, both mental and physical. If your partner shows all these signs, then start questioning your relationship. Maybe they are not the right match for you.
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