There have always been songs, poems, books and stories about love because it has always been a bit of a driving force behind the human race and everything that an average person does.
Love makes the world go round for most of us, and that is how it should be. As Percy Bysshe Shelley rightly said, ‘(when) soul meets soul on lover’s lips’. Love makes us all better, kinder people.
Healthy relationships make us work to be the best person we possibly can. Keeping all of this in mind, it is obviously sad to see marriages break apart these days, but there is a reason as to why that happens.
Objectively speaking, there are five stages of love and in these modern times, most couples do not find it in them to go on after the third stage. Let us discuss what the five stages are.
I am certain that this particular point does not need much explaining, because it is what we all feel when we first come across someone who checks all our boxes for an ideal partner.
We have butterflies in our stomach, we cannot stop thinking about them, we always want to meet and spend time with them. It is what every couple feels when they first fall in love and start dating. Everything is about them because it just feels like the right thing to do.
Now comes the seriousness part. Once you have settled down and the new relationship phase is over, things get more intense and serious. You might move in together, get married, and try having a baby, and so on. At this point, you start sharing everything with them, families meet and traditions are observed together.
The relationship dynamic is more understanding as you both just settle into each other’s lives in a more daily life basis. The sex feels very intense because you are getting closer to each other every day; you tend to become part of your partner’s habits. Things become very stable.
As the above happens and you start to spend more and more time together, the confusion stage is soon to approach both of you because let us be honest- nobody is perfect, neither are you or your partner and this becomes clear to both of you as you realize that you do not like everything about them and they too, do not like everything about you and this gives rise of fights and dissatisfaction.
You feel like they do not appreciate you enough and vice versa. Things really take a turn because in this particular stage, one can also start to resent their partners.
After the crazy confusion stage, comes the stage of the calm, where both parties are reminded that perfection is truly a myth and things are not always just the way they want them to be.
In the calm stage, the realization that both of you really do love the other hits you and you realize that speed bumps do not mean, in any case, the end of anything. You accept your partner as the person they are, no matter what their flaws might be because as mentioned above, perfection is a myth.
As you now realize that you and your partner are two different people and learn to work and cooperate around each other’s shortcomings.
As you do this and reach a common ground that works really well for the both of you, you feel and work on the need to do something that makes the world a better place, something that makes a difference.
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