I’m an introvert. No doubt about it. I would much rather stay at home and read a book than go out. Crowds are my worst nightmare. Parties are my arch nemesis. It’s difficult for me to carry on a conversation with someone I don’t know. I love being alone…etc.
But, there are times when I actually want to go to parties. I love meeting new people. I love Disneyland. All of these things are in direct contrast to what I just said about myself. Well, that’s because I’m an outgoing introvert!
If you suspect you might be one, too, read on for 6 signs that you’re an outgoing introvert.
1. People think you’re an extrovert
If you’re an outgoing introvert, people you don’t know well probably think you’re an extrovert. This is because outgoing introverts can be very friendly and chatty under the right circumstances. I’m always the first person to volunteer to help decorate for an office Christmas party. I’m more than happy to go out for happy hour with co-workers once in a while.
But, by the end of the day, I’m absolutely exhausted from all of the social interaction and can’t wait to go home where it’s nice and quiet.
2. You’re not anti-social, you’re selectively social
What I just said in the above paragraph is a good example of this. I do like going to parties. But, only once in a while and only when I know most of the people there. I love going out with friends.
But, only once in a while. I recently went on a cruise with my best friend and had a great time spending an entire week, 24/7, with her and meeting new people. I’m just very selective about my social activities.
3. You don’t like traditional systems
Traditional systems cater to the extrovert. Corporations have huge offices with large open spaces where all of the employees sit (aka cube farms). Schools put 30+ students in each class, sitting close to one another (don’t even get me started on group activities), public transportation (nuff said about that).
All of this, despite the fact that almost half of the population is introverted. Outgoing introverts are easily distracted and overwhelmed by traditional systems, which is why we don’t like them.
4. You’re the life of the party. But, you need time to warm up
Outgoing introverts do not become best friends with someone in a day, a month, or even a year sometimes. It takes time for us to warm up to people. I love the fact that people are surprised by how much fun I can be.
I love shocking people when I show my extroverted side. I don’t do it on purpose, but it always brings a smile to my face when someone tells me, “I had no idea you were like this!”
5. You have fun at the few social events you attend, but they exhaust you
Outgoing introverts need to re-charge after a social activity. If you enjoy being with the crowd, you can get some energy from that human connection.
But if you don’t, those social interactions end up draining your social batteries and the extroverts in the room end up annoying the crap out of you for sometimes no reason at all. I know when this happens to me, I tend to withdraw into myself and want to get far, far away.
6. You need to be alone sometimes
I’m not talking about wanting to be alone, I mean you NEED to be alone. Being by yourself is necessary for your mental, emotional and physical well-being. This can be easily misunderstood by someone you don’t know well, especially someone you just started dating.
Explaining this need to be alone might be helpful, but doesn’t always work. Hurt feelings can ensue because they think you don’t want to be around them; when actually, you don’t want to be around anyone.
With any luck, you’ll be dating an outgoing introvert who feels the exact same way and totally understands!
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