Relationships are hard work blended with that soothing feeling of being desired, being loved and most importantly being loved despite everything.
Here I list twenty powerful secrets which make relationships more meaningful and of substance.
1. Self-insight is the key. The partner who is calmer, gentler, more understanding and empathetic than the other saves the day for both. Also, these dynamics keep shifting.
2. External stimuli should never alter your personal equation with your loved one.
3. There is always a reason behind people’s actions. Try knowing their backgrounds before reacting to their actions or what they say.
4. Any relation or friendship that requires you to change yourself completely and to submit your dignity at their beck and call is hardly worthy.
5. Every relationship means that if you hurt the other person, you also hurt yourself. Be careful the way you treat your people because it is directly proportional to the health of your relationship.
6. Expectations have and always kill the essence of the relationship. Follow the idea of ‘tabula rasa’ and stay in relations like a blank slate. And then everything and anything will be a boon.
7. Angry defence is the worst thing to do while arguing with a loved one. Sometimes you need to just let go and other times, you have to show maturity enough to ‘argue’, if at all it is needed, with a sense of gentleness.
8. Work towards self-knowledge. The more you understand yourself, more compassionate you will be towards others.
9. When we experience pain and disappointments in our relationships we get to learn two very important things: knowledge of ourselves as to what we like or dislike and our own threshold power and it only makes us wiser and more powerful.
10. Love cannot always be reciprocated or seen or be the same way as we want it to be. Wisdom lies with the one who loves anyway.
11. The phase post-heartbreak requires sufficient amount of time for healing. Do not ever look for replacements for your loved one right away.
12. Stay away from superficiality. It is okay to be ‘a nobody’ than being someone you aren’t.
13. The more unpleasant the person is, the more he/she can teach you. Stop idealizing and making up versions of people which will never be achieved.
14. Free yourself from sense of injury and injustice. It works wonders.
15. It takes a person who is himself/herself virtuous and compassionate to identify the same qualities in others.
16. Love and lust are two very different concepts but the lines separating them are blurry. One must be careful what they are going into.
17. Side yourself with positive forces.
18. To be better at living and loving, one must steer clear from those fixed fears we all possess within ourselves.
19. Aim to be a ‘real’ person and not anyone’s version. It helps in the long run, always.
20. The greatest love is transforming for better. Though changing your original characteristics is condemned, but love should bring positive change in you.
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