Put Yourself First And Never Say Sorry For It

by Conscious Reminder

“What do you see when you look in the mirror? I hope it goes beyond beauty. I hope what you see is that person who’s worth it and deserves nothing less than the best, I hope that you see beyond the pain, I hope that you see the glory ahead of you, I hope that you see the strong woman who doesn’t break to fail, but breaks to stand and I hope that you’ll always remember that you need to love the person in the mirror first to make a change.”—Temitayo Olami

As women, we are made to feel guilty for taking up space on this planet. From a tender age we have a desire to disappear, to not be heard and to be accepted.

Patriarchy has been internalized without an opposition because women think they don’t deserve to be treated any better. Contrary to popular belief, patriarchy also affects men whereby they have to fit in the mould of toxic masculinity to be accepted. Societal norms can shape and scar you.

It is important that you decide what you want and not what others want from you. No one ever achieved anything by trying to please others.

When you are young, you have ample time attending classes in a protected environment, eating together, and even sharing similar hobbies. With time your interests become more specific and there are more demanding things that require your undivided attention, for example, academics.

When you decide to move out, there are a thousand things running in your head. Obviously you cannot dedicate the same amount of time and energy that you used to in your relationships.

The distance also plays a huge role. Under such circumstances if you find someone being extremely inconsiderate about your well being and being way too demanding- you need to draw a line.

Notice closely the people who help you get through the transition phase; people who genuinely care and put in ample amount of effort. They will be there in your journey.

Let go of any sort of negativity, you don’t need people who pull you down. A new beginning is exciting as well as scary, be with people who make you feel calm.

Most importantly, learn something new each and every day. Invest time in yourself, expand the horizon of your mind, talk about things that you want to achieve and welcome change.

This is the time where you build yourself piece by piece to become a masterpiece. Learn something new every day, meet new people and try new things. Keep yourself busy.

Putting yourself over others is the best gift you can give yourself. You are important and deserve to be loved. This is the biggest issue – we feel guilty for not giving more time to others.

People who want to get unnecessary attention can live in their own make-believe world; you need not cater to their needs. If someone values you, he/she will make it felt, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Good vibes will attract your tribe. Focus on your personal growth and achieve your dreams. Everything else will fall in place. If you treat yourself with respect and love, people already know what you expect from them.

Never ever apologize for putting yourself first because your physical and mental well being is of utmost importance. There will be people who’ll assist you in your journey. You’ll inspire people and be inspired, you’ll cheer for their success and they’ll pat your back, you’ll encourage them and they will too.

Being happy is a choice and you are the master of your mind. Don’t let anyone or anything control you.


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