In this article, we give you four phrases that gave us the wrong impression of what love is and should be.
From my perspective, the primary reason young individuals eagerly anticipate entering a relationship stems partly from the fundamental principles of relationships we’ve learned since childhood.
Essentially, we’ve instilled in our young minds the belief that we must seek and ultimately discover the ideal path to happiness. Our parents, the TV, the magazines—they have all been planting these ideas into our heads about living a fairytale that has to match Disney’s movies.
I’m not saying that I hate these concepts; I’m pointing out how they’ve affected those of us who are single, or at least how they’ve affected me. Here are a few examples:
“He/she is my better half.”
This implies that you alone are a half, and your partner alone is a half. Unless you feel whole and alone, you will always view yourself as half as valuable as you really are.
When two come together to become one, it doesn’t mean that two halves are coming together to form a whole. It means that two wholes are joining forces to create a powerhouse of wholeness.
Yes, once your life companion joins you, you’ll be able to accomplish more amazing things. Notice the comma. What you’re doing when you’re single is just as valuable to the kingdom as what you’ll do with your spouse one day.
“He/she completes me.”
I firmly believe that each of us has a perfect match or counterpart who will provide us with the chance and opportunity to grow and improve ourselves. However, we should never rely solely on others for our success.
If you don’t feel complete before you get into a relationship, be sure that another person won’t fill the void. At first, it may seem as though they do, but as the relationship progresses and the initial butterflies fade, they will reappear.
“Your Prince Charming is on his way,” or “Just keep waiting for your Prince Charming.”
I’m uncertain if there’s a similar message for men.
This is one of those phrases that puts pressure on guys and makes them feel like they are on a mission to go and find their princesses. This also makes girls and women feel like there is someone out there coming for them if they just wait long enough.
Listen, maybe it’s just my personality, but I’m not waiting on love. I have love already. Instead of sitting around counting down the minutes until my future husband or life companion arrives, I’m working.
And, please, don’t mistake me for someone who hates romance and believes that these phrases are evil; I find them sweet as long as we remember that our happiness is not external. It comes from us first, followed by our interactions with other people.
I personally can’t wait to post pictures of my future spouse and say things that let everyone know how emotionally dependable he will be, but I’m not going to paint him as someone who I depend on more than myself.
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